As tears start prickling down my face, my heart thumped and screamed out loud. I can't afford to disappoint anyone else, and yet, I always do. I'm torn. I'm lost. I've been feeling so uneasy for the past few weeks, tears roll down my cheeks every night and then... and yet, I don't know what has struck my heart to cause all these commotion. I felt like I'm losing myself. And lately I've treasured my time with mom, I see that happiness in her eyes knowing that I'm home. I know I'm still that little girl who's afraid of mom getting old, and I'm well aware that she's almost half a century old. I cannot afford to disappoint her again, yet, certain people can't seem to understand that. I'm still young, time is still on my side (I hope). Why can't people be understanding enough to honor my decision? I want what's best, and right now I feel that it's best to listen to mom's advice: to not be attached and be free from a guy. I just can't believe someone would oppose my decision. I'm sacrificing all this for my mom, because I know mom knows best. Why can't you, of all people, understand that? I'm so disappointed. Sigh. Lord, I don't know what to do. Please help.